heart of Love healing
  • home
  • Research project
    • The short version
    • The complete version part 1: How it all started
    • The complete version part 2: The results
    • The complete version part 3: Discussion and conclusion
    • Qualitative results 1: comments about the sessions
    • Qualitative results 2: comments about the overall experience
  • Testimonials
  • About Grace
  • Poems
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Links

When Things Fall Apart

22/1/2013

1 Comment

 
Stay open to things falling into place in ways that you simply couldn’t have dreamt of before, and then who knows what will happen?
Picture
I recently came across this image on the internet. Interesting thought, isn’t it?

I’ll come back to it in a moment.This year’s winter is tough on us. The colder and snowier the winter, the more of our energy it takes to deal with it: shoveling snow, staying warm, keeping in good spirits. Conversely, the less energy we have for our day-to-day life, work, and projects, including the famous New Year’s resolutions. So the good intentions we had for this year may already be falling by the wayside. Victims of a hard winter? Not only, of course, but it does take energy to focus, and when our energy is taken up elsewhere it’s definitely harder to pursue our new goals and projects.

So let’s take a moment to be kind with ourselves. Let’s allow ourselves to be human-all-too-human without berating ourselves or giving ourselves bad grades. A rough winter is enough of a challenge, there’s no need to add insult to injury.

Picture
Here’s an example of my own: I was definitely DEFINITELY going to take a 50+ fitness class this year … but with all the snow shoveling my somewhat fragile shoulder started giving me such trouble that I found myself at the osteopath instead. And since it’s not a good idea to put strain on it while it’s being treated – apart from the inevitable strain of more shoveling – the class simply has to wait. Here goes one of my good intentions!

So as the weeks of this New Year pass, we face some or maybe even all of our resolutions falling apart. But wait a minute: maybe they’re simply falling into place? Maybe, or even definitely, it makes more sense to start the fitness class once my shoulder is in better working order again? Maybe your resolution needs to be scaled down a little bit to become realistically feasible? Maybe we need to find ourselves some help in putting a resolution into practice?

When we experience things falling apart, whether it is New Year’s resolutions, new projects, or more serious things like jobs or marriages or homes, it’s easy to get stuck in that experience or even generalizing it to all of our lives. So we’re not just failing to get on with this project, we’ve always been a failure. We’re not just having relationship trouble, we’ve never been good at relationships, and so on. Allowing the mind to go down that slippery slope is a fast track into very depressive states. Please don’t do that to yourself, it’s pure poison for the soul!

Picture
And here is where the phrase I started off with comes in handy: what if the fact that things are not working out as we want them to just means that they’re working out in a different and maybe even better way? Where we see them falling apart, they may actually be falling into place. You know the kind of examples that are always given: losing a job or home makes room for finding a better one, going to a different fitness class I meet a wonderful new friend, and so on.

The important thing, then, is to keep an open mind instead of getting stuck in what seems to be a negative experience.  Stay open to things falling into place in ways that you simply couldn’t have dreamt of before, and then who knows what will happen?


Happy winter to you all!

1 Comment
S.J. McPhee
5/2/2013 09:05:38 am

Lovely photos, and a great reminder that we always have the option of shifting our perceptions. It's that state of not-knowingness in between that we need to learn to live with.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Subscribe to the heart of Love newsletter

    * indicates required
    Select your interests (choose all that apply):

    Archives

    May 2017
    January 2014
    December 2013
    August 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012

    Categories

    All
    Challenges
    Contemplation
    Fall
    Letting Go
    Life Cycles
    Love
    Peace
    Seasons

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.